Lesson 1: Respect

Weather:

All of a sudden, I just want to talk about "respect". First and foremost, in order for us to gain people's respect is to respect yourself. If you don't respect or hold yourself well, how else would people show you respect, right? One must know what are the DOs and DON'Ts in life. Lately, I haven't felt the respect I should be getting. It hurts on where the heart is.

farewell luncheon...

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A farewell luncheon today at Ichiban Boshi (amk) to bid Hui Hui and Lin Chong advanced farewell. Their contracts are ending some where middle of april. I wish all the best to them as they go on a step further in their studies or work. Yeah~

human traffic jam...

Weather:

Unusual human traffic at NYP today. I have been in school for so many years, it never take me 15 to 20 minutes to walk out from school to station. Due to the heavy rain, the underpass was flooded with water. Everyone have to walk slowly around the underpass. It feels so much like the cars along CTE. Haha!

Deciding on my future...

Weather:

Went over to Lili's place yesterday to get some advice on some business course from her elder sister. You might be asking me why is it that I am getting advice on business course instead of IT course. Well, I have been asking myself whether I would want to continue working in IT line after degree. After being around IT for about 9 months at NYP, I am starting to feel lethargic coming to work. Being lethargic is one issue. I can't wait to finish the contract and take a good break.

The second issue is that I have been accepted by NUS (School of Computing) and NTU (Interactive Media). After a good thought through of things and advices given by friends, I don't think I will be accepting the offers given by our local universities. Both courses duration are 4 years of full time studies. Apart from the duration, the cost of the degree is another consideration.

As I have used up quite a sum of my dad's cpf for my nanyang academy and nanyang poly. I need to start doing payments back to my dad as I have started working for at least a year now. After discussion with my dad, he won't be using his cpf if I were to go local university. I understand his point of view, as a dad, he felt that education is something he should provide for me. Due to some financial at home, I know my dad wouldn't be able to afford the fees.

In my view, I felt that there is a need for me to be financially independent. The feeling of being financially unstable is very uncomfortable. Therefore, another way out for me is to study part time and work at the same time. I know if I were to take this route, it's going to be a tough one. Most probably, I will take the toughest route as not to be a burden to my dad.

Dearest bought me a bear...

Weather:

It's friday at last. A day which I look forward every week. Went back home first since me and dearest finish at the same time, so can't get a lift from him. After dinner, we headed down to Vivocity to collect his working pants from G2000. Dearest was also looking for a pair of new shoes which he could use for work and study. While waiting for the G2000 salegirl to get ready the pants for collection, me and dearest went around for a walk. He got a pair of shoes at Timbaland. Can't wait to see him put it on. Hee.

All of a sudden, he told me that there is something he wanted to get for me quite sometime ago. As I was wondering what it was, we reached the shop. The shop is called "Built Your Own Bear". In this shop, you can built choose which type of bear you want and dress them anyway you want them to be.

There are a few steps to build your own bear:

1. Choose a bear design that you like (I chose velvet bear)

2. Before filling the bear you can choose whether you want to add sound or heartbeat mechanism. (I chose heartbeat)

3. Fill the bear with cotton (for mine is being filled by dearest)

4. Before the bear is being sealed, me and dearest both took a heart each. Put the heart in our palms, rub and make it warm, turn 3 rounds and then make a wish. After that, we put the hearts into the bear.

5. The bear comes with a barcode. Half of the code is being torn and put into the bear together with the hearts. If you happen to lose your bear, they will be able to know who's bear it belongs to through barcode.

6. Give the bear a little "wash".

7. Choosing of clothes for the bear.

8. Making of the bear "Birth Certificate"

My Little Brown Bear

Name: Lovey Dovey

Gender: Male

Born: 4/4/2008

Weight: 312g

Height: 32cm

好累

天气:

先在的我是一个心领很累的女人。我有满多的心里话想说但又不知如何说起。我想把我的心里话说出来却又怕我说的话会伤害到人或领到人生气。我很在意别人的情绪以及思想。我不知道如何才能达到自由说话，人会又耐心的听而又不会领到人感到伤害。我真的很矛盾。每个人都想过快了的生活，我也不例外。每个女人都希望陪自己爱的人疼爱。

我是一个很难理解的女人吗?

我只想要一个爱我，理解和谅解我，呵护与保护我，能互相信任，能和我一起度过和分享痛苦与快乐的人。我不需要你做任何大改变。如果有一点点的改变我已经心满意足。（希望你听到我内心的呐喊）

Needs someone to listen...

Weather:

There are so many things I want to say but I know there are many things we can't say it on the internet. It's not difficult to find someone who is willing to listen to my woes but sometimes I need that person who is involved in situation to listen and find a solution together.

I know it's hard at times when women want to get their message across to men and vice versa. I learn to respect that men and women are different and can never be equal. I'm willing to learn to make myself being able to be understood by people around me especially my love ones. In fact, how many people are actually willing to do that? Willing to learn doesn't mean that you forgo being yourself but knowing how to handle and understand opposite sex needs better.

There are so many things I want to know the truth and I do not have the courage to ask but then I have to understand that if the truth is being told it's going to be hurtful. So I ask myself again, would I rather be told the truth? Yes, I would rather know the truth even though it is going to be hurtful. Why? Because telling the truth won't make a person go around guessing your actions. When people start to guess, there are many possibilities and that is when mistrust, misunderstanding, doubts and fear starts flowing into mind.

In relationships, men might ask why is it when a women do something wrong and in the end the men have to apologise? "Sorry" is a very big word for men as men do not apologise unless they felt that they are in the wrong. Whereas for women, "Sorry" means they care about how you feel. "Sorry" is a magical word when a women hear the word from a men. Why? This I ain't sure but I do know that if my love were to do something wrong and apologise, I will tend to be even more forgiving. When the word "Sorry" goes into a women's ear, hearts will be like cheese melting away~

It definitely feels good to love and to be love in return. How many people are actually willing to sacrifice themselves for the person they love? I know I'm one who is willing to sacrifice many things for the person I love. People might say is it worth doing so many things and you might not get a return. In the first place, when I am willing to give I should have the preparation that I won't be able to get a return but if I did that is of course a good surprise.

Time can definitely heal many wounds and let us forget about a lot of things. Time plus someone whom you love to give love, care and concern. Healing of wounds and forgetting things can be a lot faster. I know there will always be sunshine after the rain but after sunshine there will always be rain.

Right now, I need a lot of love, care and concern. I need someone to be there for me, someone to depend on, someone to give me hugs, someone who can put me to sleep at night, someone to give me kisses, someone to be there when I fall, someone to be there when I'm happy, someone to share tears with, someone to hold on, someone who is concern about me, someone who will protect me, someone who cares everything about me, someone who loves me and someone who is willing to share each other's ups and downs. And I wish that someone is you (I won't be naming who).

- It's almost every women's wish that they will be first priority in their men's heart -